The truth

somehow i feel i should really blog on my personal feelings. due to alot of circumstances, there had been some struggling in my heart to whether i should just speak out my feelings. hmmmmm.

Howl's Moving Castle

its sunday again and guess what, i went out to meet Wendy to watch Howl's Moving Castle. a nice show indeed. Howl is so handsome. and the show is funny. haha. alot of parts made the whole cinema laugh together.

yea, and i treated my younger sister (she also went to watch) and Wendy popcorn and drink. enjoyed the show throughout and the ending song is nice.

met up with my ma later and to eat Seoul Garden. haha. okay lah. met my old colleages: people like Hafidz, Li Hwei (omg) and Naz. saw a few new faces though. and saw the "chuan shuo zhong de" Aisah (the manager whom, like all of us, dont like Li Hwei). sad to say lah.

haha. when i asked Hafidz how's Li Hwei, he was like.. no comments. lucky arh. cos just nice she walked behind him.

another manager of mine, Shannah, gave birth already. dont really like her also. cos she became evil =// she had shot gun marriage =x

but then the baby is cute larh. very cute. haha. missed the old times there. how we use to complain about the work, how we use to chat when we ate supper @ night, how we use to laugh @ one another when any of us fall down. lol.

the chairs were changed and then uniform too. @ least it looked so much nicer now :) hope all of them are doing fine now :)

A Moment to Remember

a pretty long entry ahead. please bear with it xD

met Wenna and Kai Ling @ Somerset MRT. then showed directions to Taka to the Canadian tourist named Grace. a very friendly person. first stop in Heeren was Fossil shop cos i wanna buy a Fossil watch then browsed around and got one i really like. $138 was the price. my hard earned money. gotta work during the holidays liao.

then Theresa and Jian Qi met us and so we went to HMV for a walk. then went hunting for Kenneth's present. walked here and there and found a few nice tees. settled on the blue one in 77th street. haha. the guy serving us is cute. kinda punk also. small size de.

it was so funny loh. me, Wenna and Kai Ling couldnt decide the size of Kenneth. either the tee which is within our budget is too small or has no size. how did we actually estimate his size? HAA. we used the non-living model -.-; i supposed the guy who served us find it amusing. cos he was like laughing also.

then Wenna abit not happy with the model's hair cos too long (i think they used a female's wig instead) then i tried to adjust the fringe cos she said the fringe is too long liao. it gave her the temptation to trim it. when i adjust it the first time, it seemed like they glued the wig to the model liao loh. who knows when i go and adjust it with force, the wig almost drop on the floor! omg. haha. so paiseh.

got the blue tee liao and then went Bloomington to buy paper bag. then to Taka to eat.

rushed all the way down to CauseWay Point cos me, Wenna and Kai Ling wanna watch A Moment to Remember. Kai Ling walk so fast sia. as i still owe them 5 bucks each, i gave Kai Ling a 50 bucks to go and rush and buy the tickets. in matter of seconds, she disappeared in the crowds.

called us when she bought the tickets and the timing was just right: me and Wenna were in the lift reaching 7th floor liao.

when we went in the cinema, the show has already started. prolly like 5 mins. i guess the part we left out was when the lead actress bump into the lead actor bah. the show was kinda boring @ the beginning budden the sad part came. it was the part when all 3 of us teared. and the moment when we heard people behind us unzipping their bags to search for packs of tissue. should have sought Wendy's advice to bring tissue liao.

wet the sleeve of my jacket instead. it was seriously so sad. tears just kept dropping from my eyes. tears just keep collecting in my eyes and even without any blink, the tears will just flow down my cheeks. yes, that's just how sad it is.

and for the peeps who are reading this: I STRONGLY RECOMMEND A MOMENT TO REMEMBER if you had already forgotten to cry.

when the show ended, i saw everyone had teary eyes. but for me, i had swollen eyes. that's how much i had cried. it was so sad.

the only movie in which made me cried like tomorrow'll never come. even better than WindStruck and Home Run.

bought some earrings and then headed to the BBQ place. the atmosphere was kinda weird cos there was little people we know there: close to none. then ate abit and then waited to cut the cake.

in the process of waiting, i tried to play with kids. who knows, one actually cry T.T i didnt mean to do that. i didnt make her cry. she was just scared. not me okay. everyone tried to play with the other 3 year old. but she was really so dao. she was like ignoring us when we tried to talk to her. only when i used the tic tac toe to play with her =) she only talked to me =D

what was even amazing was, she had accidentally knocked her head @ the playground cos of me. but she didnt totally 'hate' me =)

happy happy. then reach home @ abt 10. that's like 12 hours out whole day. tireddd~~~~~~

but gonna stay online though my eyes are pretty tired after all the tear dropping moments in the cinema.

this is the Fossil watch i bought:

Relationships

my friend has been down with relationship matters these few days. and my friend stated that a single life is lonely. i admit that its kinda lonely but such things cant be rush. i mean, i cant just ask any Tom, Dick or Harry to be my boyfriend. like that, i'll be changing my boyfriends in a weekly basis already.

what's the use of getting into a relationship, feel very happy at the beginning, dealt with problems in the process and end up having to let go of everything? i dont mean all relationships end like that but im sure when we get into a relationship, all we wanna do is to make sure we can keep that special someone in our heart forever.

but still, a relationship is hard to maintain. its even harder to trust and compromise, especially if you have had bad experience from a previous relationship. i also want to be with my special someone and then intro him to everyone i know saying "he's my boyfriend".

the other thing is, its definitely kinda hard to compromise since friends are also important. at one point, all of us want to spend our lives with our boyfriend/girlfriend but at the other point, we cant neglect our friends too.

spending time with our boyfriend/girlfriend makes our friends think we're neglecting them and spending time with our friends, might also make our boyfriend/girlfriend think we're neglecting them. either way, the person who suffers is ourselves.

sad case.

now, who dont want a life with a significant someone? a happy life with someone who constantly pampers you. all i have to do is to wait for that special someone to appear..

had my mma assignment demo today and guess what happened. haaa, first thing when we start our demo was, the first bug came out. our game just couldnt restart the game when it lose at the first round but Wenna lost control of the tigger and died (i knew it). then teacher spotted that bug.

later, the tigger started bounce itself mid-air. that's another bug we couldnt solve. lol.

after that, Alex showed us magic tricks with the Kids Kards. damn nice. but then ex leh 30 bucks. if not i will buy and show the trick also loh =//

then Wenna, Kai Ling and Theresa watch Inuyasha but then i brought the wrong disc. the one without the second episode. actually not my fault either. i didnt know it has such problems ;p

will borrow Tian Guo De Jia Yi from Wenna. whee!

As good as new

reformatted my lappy today. now it's so new. at least without the pop ups and the lagging.

was late for school in the morning as usual and was waiting for the lift cos i was lazy to climb the stairs. the doors of the lift opened. and omg. he was there. it was the guy whom i found the friendster. i was so stunned. cos he dressed so stylishly and even style his hair. simply so cute.

but nothing much lah. im just attracted to his voice, his looks, his everything lol. i mean, he's just those common-looking guys. and to say the truth, im usually not attracted to guys with common looks -=x

okay lets not talk about that. about the someone whom ive been trying hard to please since beginning of sem 2, is really making me more numb. im so numbed by his cold feelings towards me. everything he does or didnt do, makes me all so disappointed. simply lose hope. simply numbed.

today saw him. he was so cold towards me. said a Hi to Cheryl (yea, she and Carmen came over to NP) and didnt even bothered to say Bye when we left.

im numbed.

all the whatevers. im so sick of it.

things took a better turn nowadays. whee! xD

My hard work paid off

school as usuals these day and im happy to say im done with mma assignment already and am left with psp2 now. also done with my self-reflection paper.

Os results were out yesterday. some of my close friends didnt do very well =(

i just hope they dont feel so down.. =(

left eyelid twilt (is that the word?) which meant bad luck. indeed, when i on my laptop straight after, i saw the note WARNING: VIRUS DETECTED. oh my god. that answers why when my laptop loads to the desktop, it takes very long and sometimes never load. i just have to restart it. and my left hand menu isnt showing. this means i cant navigate the functions of blogdrive.

am gonna reformat tomorrow. =//

saw the guy who sings like The Calling. so darn cute.

spent like 5 hours looking for his friendster. was at my wit's end until i did a Yahoo! search to find Ngee Ann Song Composing Club. got to a blog of a Mass Comm babe who stated she's in the Song Composing Club so decided to drop her an E-Mail (she had her E-Maill add in her blog) cos i thought maybe i could start looking through the President of SCC which initially, all of us thought it was the guy who looks like Tao Zhe.

lucky for me, she replied my E-Mail today and stated that the President's name is Wei Jian. went to search through her friendster and found him!

he's like so cute lorh. and yes. he has a twin. so i was thinking... was all those times the person i saw was him or his twin? they look so darn alike. so cute. i had always loved twins :)

but at least im sure he is the one who sings like The Calling.

:) my efforts were paid off.

I never wanted to go home so badly

woke up with reluctance to get out from my bed in the morning. was very tired but had to get up to finish up the mma assignment.

am really glad that Wenna finished making all the scenes cos we had alot of miscommunication the night before i thought everything was gonna fall apart. but thanks Wenna. and sorry cos initially i didnt understand what you were trying to do prolly cos i dont understand you through msn. face-to-face is better.

so a quite relieved when i saw what she had done. she did so much. i was like so happy.

but then unluckiness (haha, got such word mah?) fell on me when i felt unwell. had my rants cos i felt so terrible. kept saying i wanna go home.. felt so much better when i reached home. and then continue with mma.

yeap. and thanks Yong Xiang for helping us so much. the first thing i had in mind when i got home was i wanna finish up the project to let Wenna have a peace of mind. cos she worked so hard for it and i gotta work hard too (i dont mean i didnt do anything right from the start)

haha. enough of it. we're done already! just waiting to submit it. wheeee!!

Happy baby

was on my way to school today and then was waiting for bus at the busstop. then i saw the reflection of a grandpa carrying a granddaughter walking towards my area. the baby was so cute. the hair curly curly de. then i keep staring loh.

the grandpa noticed and then was like talking to me, telling me he's taking care of his grandchildren, the baby in his hands is 1 yr and 2 months old and tried to make the baby play with me. damn cute de.

she was so shy and then she didnt dare to do anything. no smiles no nothing. but then she got so high when i high five-ed with her. so cute. showed her two dimples.. kawaii..

board the same bus with them too. then when they were to alight, the grandpa asked the baby to wave goodbye to me. the auntie beside me, who was also staring at the baby, thought the grandpa was trying to make his granddaughter wave goodbye to her, then she waved back. lol -.-;

but so cute lah...

people i met recently: Sec school peeps: Mr Noh, Kai Lyn, Hui Hui, Shu Mei, Pei Jun, Joe. Others: Ain, Mandy.

Results

here are my results for my module. be it common test or what. here it goes:

Common Tests:
Programming and Problem Solving 2: A
Event Driven Programming: A+
Operating Systems: C
Business Information System: D
Business Information System Project: B

haha. abit decelerating huh =xxxx

will work harder! common tests in like 4 weeks' time!

Reminders:
MMA assignment by this Sunday
PSP2 assignment by 4/o3/o5
Self Reflection paper by next Tuesday

I yearn for your understanding

was just wondering that why do people get influenced easily?

i believe people do get easily influenced when their good friend tell them that this person has a bad personality. what i mean is, if your good friend tells you that John is a bad guy, would you think of him that way too?

im sure many would say yes. i admit im also one of these people. but i must say i will change my opinion if i really interact with that someone and find his/her nice personality.

but did anyone really spare a thought for that he/she? how would he/she feel? people "discriminating" them. so am i right to say if i dislike this particular someone, i will go and tell the hundreds of friends i know and let that particular someone hated by my hundreds of friends?

NO.

if anyone love to do such things, i hope you understand the plight of these people.

understand my plight.

im a human too. im born not to let others hate or discriminate. at least i believe im born for a reason. at least im sure im born to make a great impact on some people's life. at least i believe im important to at least one person on this earth. at least i believe everyone doesnt like a life like that.

raise your hands if you love a life like that.

back to today. had OP today. yupx. at least its over and done with. whee! Vanitha got jealous cos im done with it. hurhur xP

everyone did well. but i stumbled over my words =//

had good comments from my lecturer. well, she's always so nice =D

then had S&W. played a match with the girls. well, it was definitely so much fun and not so stressful. at least i like it better than playing with the guys. the guys take the game too seriously and made me dont wanna even touch the ball =//

so happy! OP is done. next up is EVP demo. and then have to do the self reflection paper. hope i rememberR!

Yesterday

was so frustrated in the morning i forgot to update about yesterday. oh ya, met Pei Jun through Maple yesterday. haha, through Silvirin. its been a million years i last talk to her. and then sorta dying to meet her cos its been so long i can almost forget how she look like.

Silvirin joke by saying we'll meet on sunday haha but who knows, we met up at Jurong Point and then head to Silvirin's crib to Maple. LOL.

she changed alot larh. but the initial feeling was awkward. cos i haven interact much with her since we got not so close when we were sec 3. she became more girlish but im not used to it. its good anyway, she's a girl mah :)

crapped abit. but the feeling talking to her was also awkward at first. but then it became okay after that x)

Fucked up

i feel so fucking down now. what the fuck have i done?! tell me!

why the fuck are you pissed with me? or are you fucking jealous of me?

i just cant stand it when you fucking try to make my life miserable.

if you fucking dont wanna talk to me, then i'll fucking shut my mouth, you bloody fucker.

so suck some ass..

if you love the fucking threesome, then i'll let you have your threesome, you fucking asshole who loves to outcast me.

sorry for this fucked up entry cos im feeling so fucked up now.

Busy, busy, busy

had S&W yesterday. heard that its coming to an end next week. that's like whee! haha. ran like 7 rounds but then i cheated cos i really cannot run larh. i dont have the stamina..

and then continued with EVP. omg, im really thankful that Zaki send me his EVP. not that i copied his, but i take it as a guide and it really helped! hahahas. will clear my doubts with William tommorrow. hopefully i wont be late! cos only 1 hour lesson!

then did MMA assignment with Wenna. couldnt get the background right, so i did the codes and she did the flowers instead. i just hope it's as simple as i thought it is =//

ohh i almost forgot to add what happened yesterday. well, it all started when i was walking behind Wenna and i realised she was walking into the gents (that was when we wanted to go to the ladies to change into S&W attire. my immediate and sorta foolish reaction was "Wenna! NAN DE!" nan de as in its gents! haha. then people from softball looked over.

and then when the loser and the loser had to compete with each other (i mean 4 teams had compete with each other and then loser and loser battle and winner and winner battle) Wenna and my team were the loser teams and then we were walking towards the other basketball court. i saw a piece of sole from a shoe and jokingly told Wenna that her soles has dropped off. her immediate reaction was "HUH?!" and then checked her soles -.-;

hmmm. today's Wendy and Wenna's birthday. wish them happy birthday :)

Enjoyable CNY

Shu Mei joined us for the visiting today. but we didnt go to muh house cos muh ma went out.

Zi Qian's house was da first stop and we gambled. oh man, borrowed like 500c from Shu Mei and am left with 200c now. sobx.

haha. the last gambling was "In Between". that's real fun. its like everyone else didnt want to play anymore except for me and Shu Mei and then i just keep giving small bets on those possible winnings. bet on like 30c each and keep getting 30c back until there was this once i just didnt want to make a bet. oh muh god, luck was with me that time budden Peng kept thinking i cheated -.-;

ive got no luck for this cny.

then headed to Peng's house. oh muh god. i must really admit that her house was darn nice. so antique like so special; simply so nice. oh muh god. i just wondered why she never liked us to go visit her house. it was like.. erm.. sooooo nice.

gambled at her crib again. this time the wins and losses are half half larh.

walked all the way to Silvirin's house next. played monopoly from 7 till 9 plus. that game can really keep us entertained for hours. took photos and had some cat fight with Shu Mei. hur hur. budden its so paiseh. Silvirin's brothers were like witnessing it and even video cam-ed it down -.-;

time to go home already! left the house at 10+ and reached home at 11. ate my dinner at 1130 (or should i call it supper) and am online now. i just didnt want to sleep early. i'd rather sleep at 2 than to wake up with bloated stomach and have all the food i consumed turning into fats =//

Continued

forgot to mentioned that everyone over at ah ma (mum's godma) has changed alot. the two guys have been more beng, which is not a good thing. one thing is, ah bee, a 12 year old boy, is so darn cute. he's like primary 6 already but standing tall at 130cm and crushing the earth at 20+kg. that's so cute right?

also, his voice is so very much like a kid. so ke ai. i remembered few years back when i saw him, i thought he was only 5 years old. to my atonishment, he was aactually 9 years old already. omg.

haha. but he's so ke ai :)

Gastric

woke up with a terrible gastric pain. it was so unbearable that i almost couldnt sit up. but i had to.

relatives from Malaysia came over. yeah! Zi Ling was so darn cute. her hair was tied up in two pony tails and she looked like the little girl in Monster Inc. whats even cuter is that she was wearing a pair of angel wings at the back cos i put it on her. so sweet and cute.

then my uncle sent me to Kai Ling's house.

played mahjong and borrowed 100c from Wenna and Xeno each. ended up losing about 130c in the end. poor me.

luck wasnt in me until i got so stressed up cos im bankrupted. was like ready for "pong pong hu" and were waiting for 3 tiles to complete. then one by one it came. then TADA! Kenneth discarded the tile i wanted to win!! whee!! then i got like 150c liao. hehes.

here and there win and lose abit but then had fun.

then left them early cos i have to go to my mum's godma's house.

ah ma (mum's godma) said she dont have much 'time' left. *sobs* i can actually see that. she was so healthy a few years back. walking around the house and stuff, then she needs a walking stick like last year or something and now she looks so weak =//

tomorrow going out with Silvirin, Zi Qian, Peng and Shu Mei. going to each others' house to 'bai nian'. whee! then going out with Wendy at the evening (maybe).

i just realised this cny has been packed for me. it has never been so happenin' before. but im glad :)

Third day of CNY

its the third day of CNY liao. haha.

Wenna, Kai Ling, Theresa and Jian Qi came to my house today. so paiseh. my room is in a mess. so teenagerieee. lol.

then headed to Sam's house. OMG. at Hougang. so very the far.. played blackjack with the borrowed 50c from Sam. then from 50c to 20c to 130c. wheee~~ well, i wont forget i left my 80c at Sam's piggy! i will want it back next year! haha. but prolly i'll forget about it. haha.

am going to Kai Ling's crib tomorrow. prolly gamble again. whee! lol.

The relatives from Malaysia

haven been updating cos ive been lazy as i dont see frequent readers.

will start with Monday

Monday, o7o2o5

schools as usual then went to IMM to get my book changed. whee! i got through! yeah! im glad that trip wasnt wasted. went to Teban after that to visit Yen Loo and chatted with her till its like 645 and took bus home. bought Inuyasha box 5 too! yeah!

Tuesday, o8o2o5

no school! whee! mapled the whole day till its 6 plus and went to grandma's house for reunion dinner. hahas. am not afraid of the dog anymore! it's name is Bonnie! will post up the pictures later. yes, that killer dog chased me around the whole house a few years back and scratched me. will never forgot. but im no longer afraid ot it le. hehes.

Wednesday, o9o2o5

went grandma house again. this time collecting angbaos. hahas! money keep flowing in!

saw my cute little cousing Li Xin and i feel so bad. the dog went up to her and scratched her. what happened was, she wanted to pat the dog on the butt. but i want her to pat it on the head instead. when i let her down, she panicked as the dog stood up (it was sitting down previously) and then she screamed and jump. the dog charged at her and scratched her. she then blamed me for all that has happened. im innocent!

then came the VIP or should i say VIB (Very Important Baby) yes! thats my little nephew! (im not boosting im finally an AUNT now) he's so darn cute. his name is Zhe Kai. only about 2 months old but soooo big in size already! pictures later!

head to Malaysia after that. saw the many cute little cousins. OMG. once again im mad. hahas.

i simply love Wu Jun and Wen Kai! they're so cuteee! but they're soo badd! they ignore me! especially Wen Kai! T.T

Thursday, 1oo2o5

last day of interaction with the kids but i surely took tons of pictures of them, including a cute so-called stray dog.

am back home now cos there arent really anymore interesting things to post liao.

pictures now!

yes yes! the kids!

Bonnie! killer dog!

the so-called stray doggie. but its cute and small and tamed :)

Shi Tong! the unbelivably cute and pinchable cheeks girl. who is just soo cute.

my favorite! Wen Kai! i finally made them come to me and show me what he's holding :D

the brother of Wen Kai. he's name is Wu Jun. he just loves to hide behind the door and then let me take snapshots of him. hmm :// but i love him too!

so much for my adventures with kids. ooooo. i just love kids =D

Jay, Jay, JAY!

hur hur. dont know what title to put so i put Jay in my title just to say I Love Jay!

haha. realised ive been going out with my mum alot nowadays. yesterday went to Giant with her to buy some new year goods and man, got so tired when i reached home. today, i went to look for her at her workplace to buy an S&K skirt. whee~~ i love her man. though she is just gonna buy that skirt for me for new year.

Jun Rong work at S&K Clementi but somehow he seemed so restless and tired when i so-called 'visited' him just now. haha. my mum and aunt has been really hard to serve ya. LOL.

my aunt and cousin came to visit us from Malaysia. and then is back to Woodlands to stay at my uncle's house liao.

then surprisingly, my uncle(another uncle) and my little cousins came to visit. man, the youngest one was so darn cute and i missed her. its so hard to interact with her cos she'll forgot me so fast. so what i did was when they were at the door, i said "i wont let you in unless you greet me but i let your korkor and jiejie in." haha. it worked. she greeted me.

my cousin got so excited about MapleStory and was like snatching the laptop from me. oh man, and then i decided to quit and let him watch animations. couldnt think of any site except HappyTreeFriends. i hope that did not pollute their young minds =//

i asked the little cousin to sit on my lappy. whee~ she's so obedient. then she somewhat stick so me. sooo sweet. hurhur.

follow up is a picture of me and her and a solo picture of herself:

the picture size is so small cos i didnt know i set that as the default =// but she's cute eh? ^^



the picture her 10 year old brother took. nice one. so natural. so kawaii. and yes, her name's Zi Ling :)

when all of them left the place, mum and i head to Jurong East to have our dinner and she wanted to shop for some new year goodies.

my mum is so absentminded. initially i chose a two-seat table for us to sit, then i went to buy food. when i was back, she changed places so we ate there. when we finished our dinner and about to leave, i realised my bag was missing. and then i found it on the initial place we sat!! OMG. if it was missing, i would have gone mad cos i had like 60 bucks in there!!

went to NTUC to choose chocos cos im afraid she would choose then not-so-nice ones. hurhur. done with that and head to Popular alone cos she said she could manage. saw Angela(Bryan's darling) and bought the Incomparable to Jay VCD liao. whee!! thanks for the discount man.

next up was IMM. i want to buy the storybook about Jay i saw yesterday. went there and looked for Bryan and then went up with him. yes, the book's in my hands now. BUT there's a flaw with the BOOK!! one of the ends of the pages got folded! WHY? cos it was printed too big. you know, those kinda when you see folded pages of new book and when you open out, its a large unfit piece of corner. OMG. i just hope i can change it!!

i will head there tomorrow.

BAD NEWS: on the receipt, i saw the words "goods sold are not refundable or exchangable"!! i hope they just let me change! T.T

OS & BIS

last two papers already yet im still slacking around. it's now 230 pm and everyone's at home except for my dad.

heard some amazing things from my mother about my past grandfather. cos there's a white butterfly which is stuck at the (erm i dont know what that's called. in chinese it's shen tai). mom immediately used two red things (dont know what's that again =//) to asked if 'it's my grandpa'. it showed a yes.

and then my mom told us that once prayed to my grandpa saying she dont want anything but to strike 4D with my house's door unit number. yes. she did won the first prize and got a 2k. that was for the house rent bill which increased up to 2k++.

i just love my grandpa.

my younger sister's school is really strange. on the days she was present in school, they called to ask why is she not in school. and today, she did not go to school cos her alarm didnt wake her up. yet when she called to say she's not in school, they claimed she's in school. now, who's the one they saw? ~.~